The Sozzled Mumble

611 minutes of Dexter Series 2 this weekend.

We've decided to really try and cut back going out and such for the next few months to see how much money we can save for a deposit. Hence the DVD weekend. Although, saying that, a friend of ours has advised that we get a £7000 personal loan to go towards a deposit. If we save up and it takes 2 years to get the extra money we need - both house prices and probably interest rates will have gone up anyway. I guess this makes sense but I'm not so sure........

Dads Spanish Stew for tea. Not made by dad. Made by us. Never made it before so hopefully it'll taste just like dads. Will post the recipe if we pull it off.

Why is filling out job applications so hard?

Why are you applying? I am applying because I want to buy a house and need more money to save a decent deposit. I also want more money to buy shoes.

Please tell us how you fit our criteria. Erm...I can type.....and speak.

Any other relevant information. Yes, I enjoy a good whisky and that chocolate sauce that sets when its poured on ice cream

Right, listen here, there is something about me that I think you should know.

It's a filthy, dirt-ridden secret.

I am NOT the spontaneous type.

Ok! I've said it. My pretend name is Jembajr and I am not spontaneous. Phew, that feels good!! You, know, just to get it out there and to finally admit it. The first step to recovery is to admit these things isn't that right? Except, I won't get better. I will always be 'not spontaneous.'

But that's ok. I'm comfortable with knowing this. So, I didn't go for the tattoo......Well, not today anyway. After the initial diarrhea provoking thoughts of it I got into the idea. Carpe Diem and all that. But walking round the shops, I couldn't get rid of the gnawing feeling in me waters that this was not a good idea right now. If something is going to happen whether that's a holiday or just going round the in-laws I like to know what, where, when, why, how much alcohol is involved.....I like to get the WHOLE picture before embarking on any sort of jaunt outside of the house. I like to walk all around it having a good old sniff before passing approval.

In essence I need to plan spontaneity.

So, we have rescheduled for a couple of weeks time. Which means I can do all of the above and, hopefully, feel comfortable and maybe even a little excited about it.

In other news. The bank will lend us shitloads more than we thought to buy a house. Which made us very happy. I didn't get any birthday clothes because I was freaking out too much about the tat. I had my birthday lunch at my favourite french restaurant and was given a £30 bottle of bubbly for free Then we came back to the house and had a good old snooze.....because we are in our 30's

Thanks for all the birthday wishes. Hope you're all having a lovely day too.

Well the fella's gone and done it.

I said that the only way I'd get into a tattoo studio is by him booking it for me - then I wouldn't have an excuse then would I??

4pm today with Woody.

Now, I don't have to go. I was initially in the flight of the flight or fight mode earlier but I am slowly thinking maybe I should just go and do it. I've been harping on about it for long enough.

It'll just be a few stars on my wrist. Yeah, and I already know that 'everyone gets stars' but I haven't got them.

Hmmmmmmm. What to do!! What to do!!

I have finished reading The Book Thief.

What am I supposed to read now that will stand up next to it?

A period of mourning with commence immediately.

Deaths not narrating this one stolen from brokendownangel.

1. ONE OF YOUR SCARS, HOW DID YOU GET IT?
- Scar on the bridge of my nose. My older brother threw a childs blackboard at me when we were very young - there was blood everywhere. He does love me though!

2. WHAT IS ON THE WALLS IN YOUR BEDROOM?
- Paint and a couple of pictures drawn for us when we were in Sicily

3. WHAT DOES YOUR MOBILE PHONE LOOK LIKE?
- A pink pebble

4. WHAT MUSIC DO YOU LISTEN TO?
- All sorts

5. DO YOU KNOW WHAT TIME YOU WERE BORN?
- Around midnight I think

6. WHAT DO YOU WANT MORE THAN ANYTHING RIGHT NOW?
- To forget the story in The Book Thief so I can read it all again.

7. WHO DO YOU MISS?
- My mum

8. IS ANYONE IN LOVE WITH YOUR OR HAS A CRUSH ON YOU?
- Yes and Yes

9. WHO WAS THE LAST PERSON YOU KISSED?
- The fella this morning but I can't remember it

10. WHAT’S YOUR MIDDLE NAME?
- Don't have one

11. THE BEST TV SHOW EVER CREATED:
- Eastenders - its real man!

12. THE LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO?
- A receptionist

13. DO YOU GET SCARED IN THE DARK?
- Sometimes.

14. THE LAST PERSON TO MAKE YOU CRY?
- Wendy Richards husband when he was describing the last minutes he spent with his wife

15. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE COLOGNE / PERFUME?
- I am currently loving Christina Aguleria's one

16. WHAT KIND OF HAIR/EYE COLOUR DO YOU LIKE ON THE OPPOSITE SEX?
- Brown and I don't care what colour the eyes are - I am not an eye fascist

17. WOULD YOU RATHER BE SMART OR FUNNY?
- Smart

18. COFFEE OR ENERGY DRINKS?
- Neither

19. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE PIZZA TOPPING?
- Pepperoni

20. IF YOU CAN EAT ANYTHING RIGHT NOW, WHAT WOULD IT BE?
- A crispy bacon sandwich.

21. WHO IS THE LAST PERSON WHO MADE YOU MAD?
- The fella probably

22. DO YOU SPEAK ANOTHER LANGUAGE?
- No

23. WHAT WAS THE FIRST GIFT SOMEONE EVER GAVE YOU?
- Probably some sort of teddy

24. DO YOU LIKE SOMEONE?
- I like a lot of people at the mo

25. ARE YOU DOUBLE JOINTED?
- No.

26. FAVOURITE CLOTHING BRAND?
- Don't have one. If I like it I'll get it.

27. WHAT’S YOUR DREAM CAR?
- Ford Ka Collection - the one I have yeee-haaaa

28. WHAT COLOUR IS IT?
- Panther black

29. WHAT’S YOUR FAVOURITE KIND OF EXERCISE?
- Walking

30. WOULD YOU FALL IN LOVE KNOWING THAT THE PERSON IS LEAVING?
- No

31. WHAT IS THE BEST WAY TO TELL SOMEONE HOW MUCH THEY MEAN TO YOU?
- It's not to tell them at all it's to show them - little daily acts usually do the trick - I agree with brokendownangel on this one

32. WRITE A NUMBER FROM ONE TO A HUNDRED:
- 8

33. BLONDES OR BRUNETTES?
- Blonde

34. WHAT IS THE ONE NUMBER YOU CALL OFTEN?
- home

35. WHAT ANNOYS YOU MOST?
- Arrogance

35. HAVE YOU BEEN OUT OF YOUR COUNTRY? WHERE DID YOU GO? WHAT PLACE DID YOU LIKE BEST?
- That question is a whole blog entry on its own. Sicily was fantastic.

36. YOUR WEAKNESSES?
- Books

37. FRIES/CHIPS, RICE OR BEANS?
- Rice - with tonnes of soy sauce

38. FIRST JOB?
- Shop

39. EVER PRANK CALLED SOMEONE?
- Yes

40. WHAT WERE YOU DOING BEFORE YOU FILLED OUT THIS?
- Organising a whole bunch of things to make me a better person

41. IF YOU COULD GET PLASTIC SURGERY WHAT WOULD IT BE?
- I'd get the bit of fat under my chin sucked out.

42. WHY DID YOU FILL OUT THIS MEME?
- BECAUSE I LOVE IT!!!!!!!

43. WHAT DO YOU GET COMPLIMENTED ABOUT MOST?
- My figure

44. WHAT WOULD YOU DO IF ALCOHOL BECAME ILLEGAL?
- Go underground

45. WHAT DO YOU WANT FOR YOUR BIRTHDAY?
- Well, it's tomorrow and I still haven't a clue at this point. So, anything/nothing will do.

46. HOW MANY KIDS DO YOU WANT?
- 2

47. WHERE YOU NAMED AFTER ANYONE?
- No.

48. DO YOU WISH ON STARS?
- No

49. WHICH FINGER[S] IS YOUR FAVOURITE?
- The magic finger

50. WHEN DID YOU LAST CRY?
- Was it this week??

51. DO YOU LIKE YOUR HANDWRITING?
- Bloody hell no

52. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE LUNCH MEAT?
- Chicken

53. ANY BAD HABITS?
- I crack my knuckles

54. WHAT IS YOUR MOST EMBARRASSING CD ON THE SHELF?
- I am so super cool that I have none

55. IF YOU WERE ANOTHER PERSON, WOULD YOU BE FRIENDS WITH YOU?
- Absolutely.

56. HAVE YOU EVER TOLD A SECRET YOU SWORE NOT TO TELL?
- No.

57. DO LOOKS MATTER?
- In normal day to day matters no, but if you want to fall in love etc they do.

58. HOW DO YOU RELEASE YOUR ANGER?
- Throw something

59. WHERE IS YOUR SECOND HOME?
- NI

60. DO YOU TRUST OTHERS EASILY?
- Not really

61. WHAT WAS YOUR FAVOURITE TOY AS A CHILD?
- Sad Sam - he is still with me on my bedside table

62. HOW MANY NUMBERS ARE IN YOUR MOBILE PHONE?
- Enough

63. DO YOU USE SARCASM?
- always.

64. DO YOU KNOW ANYONE FAMOUS?
- No

65. HAVE YOU EVER BEEN IN A MOSH PIT?
- Yes

66. WHAT DO YOU LOOK FOR IN A PLACE TO LIVE?
- Location, size

67. WHAT ARE YOUR NICKNAMES?
- spange, spangie, pange pango, pango chutney, pango chutney the third - it goes on........and on........

68. HOW MANY HATS DO YOU OWN? WHAT'S YOUR HAT SIZE?
- A cap and a beanie - I would assume my hat size is the same as my glasses size - child small.

69. DO YOU UNTIE YOUR SHOES WHEN YOU TAKE THEM OFF?
- No, which annoys me.

70. WERE YOU UPSET ABOUT STEVE IRWIN DYING?
- Yes

71. WHAT’S YOUR FAVOURITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR?
- Vanilla

72. ARE YOU LAZY?
- I can be

73. WHAT ARE YOUR FAVOURITE SONGS AT THE MOMENT?
- Any James Morrison

74. WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE BAND?
- MSP

75. HOW MANY WISDOM TEETH DO YOU HAVE?
- None

76. DO YOU WANT TO GO ANYWHERE SPECIAL THIS YEAR?
- NI

77. WHAT ARE YOU LISTENING TO RIGHT NOW?
- Loose Women twittering

78. LAST THING YOU ATE?
- Scrambled egg on toast

79. LAST PERSON YOU TALKED TO ON THE PHONE?
- Haven't I just answered this it was that receptionist

80. WHATS THE FIRST THING YOU NOTICE ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE MORNING?
- Why have I still got smudges of mascara on when I took it off last night?

81. FAVOURITE THOUGHT PROVOKING SONG:
- Oh christ, next!

82. FAVOURITE TWO THINGS TO HATE:
- Porridge and buses

83. FAVOURITE DRINK:
- Grouse and lemonade

84. FAVOURITE ZODIAC SIGN
- Aries

85. SPORTS YOU LIKE TO WATCH?
- Snooker

86. WHAT IS YOUR HAIR COLOUR?
- Dirty fair

87. EYE COLOUR?
- blue

88. DO YOU WEAR GLASSES?
- I am wearing my childs glasses now. Not MY child - childrens ones.

89. SIBLINGS?
- 2 brothers, 1 sister

90. FAVOURITE MONTH(s)
- November & December

91. DO YOU LIKE SUSHI?
- Never tried it - doesn't look like something I would like

92. LAST THING YOU WATCHED?
- This Morning

93. FAVOURITE DAY OF THE YEAR?
- My birthday

94. ARE YOU TOO SHY TO ASK SOMEONE OUT?
- Too married to ask someone out

95. SUMMER OR WINTER?
- Winter

96. KISSES OR HUGS?
- Hugs.

97. RELATIONSHIPS OR ONE-NIGHT STANDS?
- Relationships

98. WHO IS YOUR FAVOURITE CELEBRITY?
- Probably Al Pacino

99. WHO IS THE LEAST LIKELY TO ASK YOU ON A DATE?
- A gay man

100. BOOKS YOU'D LIKE TO SEE TURNED INTO A FILM?
- The book thief

This cold of mine - I shit on it's face!!

Anyway, standing waiting to board the plane and my da phones with news that my sis slept in and missed her plane so no sis and no boy. However, after much circling in the air waiting for fog to clear so we could land (was getting dizzy) we arrived to the news that my sis and boy were coming after all on another flight.

So we are all here and boy has filled out nicely. He can sit up on his own now and is full of smiles and giggles. Woke me up at 3am though twittering to himself. Or quite possibly to Stephen Fry. He's lovely.

Had a couple of 99's from 'The Greatest Ice-Cream Shop In The World' - The Cabin. They only do vanilla and it's all home made with a secret recipe. Go there.

Shopping in Belfast tomorrow with mummy. Hope this cold with withstand Primark.

Also featured blog again. ha ha.

A nice little play tonight (An Inspector Calls)

And a dumbass early flight to NI tomorrow morning.

My sis is bringing the boy over as well. So I get to give lots of auntie hugs. Maybe no kisses as I've had a touch of the cold for the last 2 days (just to pile onto all the buggery other health garbage that's been going on.)

I'm feeling quite content today as we've been into town and had a lovely lunch at our usual french restaurant and I also walked into a gym for the first time in my life. The fella was showing me round as I need to start exercising if I want to have pain free periods. That's the theory anyway. It's all a bit daunting. Everyone looks so sure of themselves swaning around in their joggers looking cool and waving to each other.

Hmmm going to make a proper appointment for next week with a gym instructor and then hopefully sign up for some classes.

1. To celebrate the first day of spring, an ice cream parlour in Amercia are giving away free ice cream all day Friday. What is your favourite flavour ice cream?
Vanilla - yes, I am a purist

2. Today is officially the first day of spring in the UK. When you think of spring, what is it that comes to your mind first?
Crisp, sunny, blue skied mornings

3. Do you wish that daffodils, snowdrops and other spring flowers would flower all year round??
It is in the top 10 of my all time wishes

4. Have you got your garden looking all spring like yet?
I have not been blessed with a garden. Stop mocking me question!!!

5. What will you do today to feel all spring like (keep it clean you smut monsters out there!!)??
Frolic into town rather than walk.

That was fun

I don't know what I have done.

But my bowel is extremely irritated by me.

The Londoners came up on Saturday.

We have now booked our Cyprus villa. It is very swanky and even has its own outside stone baked pizza oven. Worth going to Cyprus for. We've still to book the flights though so hopefully our excitement isn't too premature. I haven't had a proper beach/sun holiday for years so I am particularly excited about going away for a week.

We went out to the best Indian in Yorkshire (Aagrah) then ended up slumped and exhausted in a local pub. We had to slope off around midnight we were that tired! Gone are the days of necking £1 bottles of wine as a pre-going out tipple followed by a couple of vodka and red bulls and a few aftershocks in at least 3 different pubs, then heading off to the nightclub until 2am chucking back even more vodka/aftershock combos then when that was done heading home to continue the drinking until around 5am. And still being able to get up fresh and brand new for a 9am lecture.

Now it's 3 whisky and lemonades and I have to call it a night.

Oh, and by the time I got home my feet had swollen to the size of them monster slipper feet. New shoes. Shouldn't have taken them off in the pub.

I gave £25 to people I don't know. So to redress the balance I have taken this from some-one I don't know.

Would you rather...(you really have to chose)

fight right away or walk away? Walk Away

get stuck in the elevator for 34 hours or gain 15 pounds? Gain 15 pounds. You can buy 2 books with that

be a ninja or be a pirate? Ninja - the outfit is sexier

have love but no money or have money but no love? I already have it - love with no money

watch Oprah or watch Dr. Phil? Oprah!! Dr Phil has gotten too full of himself

drink coffee or drink tea? Ok, I don't drink either of these but as the rules say 'I really have to chose' so....tea

be trapped in haunted house all alone or be trapped on deserted island all alone? haunted house as you'll still have all the amenities at your disposal - toilet, TV etc

live in USA or live in Europe? Europe

sing karaoke or pole dance? Pole dance (but just for the fella)

watch a boring movie cos your significant other wants to see it or read a boring book cos your significant other recommends it for you? Watch the film - you can snooze without him noticing

play tennis or play hockey? Hockey

travel by plane or travel by train? Plane

kill your own meat or become vegetarian? Oh crap. Er....kill my own meat.

date the wrong people until you find the one or be a single until you find the one? I guess you need to date wrong un's - afterall you don't know they're wrong when they first ask you out

calm an angry lion or anger a calm lion? Anger a calm lion

answer these questions or do something useful? Well, I've already answered them so.......

A&E on Sunday morning.

Suffering really bad stomach pains for about 6 hours so had no other choice but to go to A&E at 3am. Got seen straight away. Nothing major wrong. Thought it was the pain killer that I took for cramps over-filling my belly with acid or something. Some more pain killers and some capsules to contain the acid and I got to go home at 7:30am.

Fed up. Although all the doctors and nurses were lovely.

I got Pollo con Funghi.

It came with cubed potatoes with a wee side salad. I ended up ordering some broccoli anyway but it was all very nice. My head was turned by the choco pudding and ice cream which was nice but I should have really got the tiramisu. No-one else got a pudding. It annoys me when you go out to dinner and no-one wants afters. Isn't that all part of the culinary experience??

Anyway, I am not shy when it comes to pudding. If they all want to wait for me to finish whilst staring and salivating at my dish then they can go right ahead.

Got me a jacket from Primark for £14.85!! today. It's one of those wee bomber jackets that I have been wanting for ages. My friend was wearing one last night so I bought the same one. I do hope she won't think this is a case of Single White Female. Although I did like the dress she was wearing which was also from Primark..........

Had a wee look at tonights menu.

I don't know if it's just me but there doesn't appear to be much on there. What does Contorni mean?? Starter?? There's potatoes under that section, maybe it means sides. Er.............When you ask for a main do you have to order your veg etc from the Contorni? If you order 'the chicken' or 'the salmon' in Sicily that's all you get. No veg or chips or owt. Apparently you have to order all those things extra. We didn't know that when we went coz we were young and foolish. So we were starving most of the time.

There is something called Rossa which is a pizza with spicy southern Italian salami, roasted red peppers, chilli, caramelised onion, garlic, fresh oregano, tomato and mozzarella and olives which I'll probably order. I'd quite like the Pollo con Funghi but not sure how to get round the veg/potato scenario.

They also have Tiramisu.

Out tonight.

For the first time in ages. I feel like I've been stuck to the sofa decomposing stylee for the last 2 weeks. I was afraid that maggots would be found crawling out of me pants. Anyway, I think it's Italian tonight which I'm not too thrilled about because I prefer it spicy. Some-one has vouchers or something so that's why we are going I don't care really as I intend to get my whisky on fully tonight.

Pizza or pasta? God I hate that that's the only choice. I'll probably go for pizza although fancy a bit of lasagne. What a tough one!!!

The BBC believes most people will have only read 6 of the 100 books here. How do your reading habits stack up?

Instructions:
Look at the list and mark in bold those you have read and italicise the ones you own but haven't read yet (note, not just own and will never read ).

1 Pride and Prejudice - Jane Austen
2 The Lord of the Rings - JRR Tolkien - (started it but watched films instead)
3 Jane Eyre - Charlotte Bronte
4 Harry Potter series - JK Rowling
5 To Kill a Mockingbird - Harper Lee
6 The Bible
7 Wuthering Heights - Emily Bronte
8 Nineteen Eighty Four - George Orwell
9 His Dark Materials - Philip Pullman
10 Great Expectations - Charles Dickens
11 Little Women - Louisa M Alcott
12 Tess of the D’Urbervilles - Thomas Hardy
13 Catch 22 - Joseph Heller
14 Complete Works of Shakespeare
15 Rebecca - Daphne Du Maurier
16 The Hobbit - JRR Tolkien
17 Birdsong - Sebastian Faulk
18 Catcher in the Rye - JD Salinger
19 The Time Traveller’s Wife - Audrey Niffenegger
20 Middlemarch - George Eliot
21 Gone With The Wind - Margaret Mitchell
22 The Great Gatsby - F Scott Fitzgerald (One of my favourite books EVER!!)
23 Bleak House - Charles Dickens
24 War and Peace - Leo Tolstoy
25 The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy - Douglas Adams
26 Brideshead Revisited - Evelyn Waugh
27 Crime and Punishment - Fyodor Dostoyevsky
28 Grapes of Wrath - John Steinbeck
29 Alice in Wonderland - Lewis Carroll
30 The Wind in the Willows - Kenneth Grahame
31 Anna Karenina - Leo Tolstoy
32 David Copperfield - Charles Dickens
33 Chronicles of Narnia - CS Lewis
34 Emma - Jane Austen
35 Persuasion - Jane Austen
36 The Lion, The Witch and The Wardrobe - CS Lewis
37 The Kite Runner - Khaled Hosseini
38 Captain Corelli’s Mandolin - Louis De Bernieres
39 Memoirs of a Geisha - Arthur Golden
40 Winnie the Pooh - AA Milne
41 Animal Farm - George Orwell
42 The Da Vinci Code - Dan Brown
43 One Hundred Years of Solitude - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
44 A Prayer for Owen Meaney - John Irving
45 The Woman in White - Wilkie Collins
46 Anne of Green Gables - LM Montgomery
47 Far From The Madding Crowd - Thomas Hardy
48 The Handmaid’s Tale - Margaret Atwood
49 Lord of the Flies - William Golding
50 Atonement - Ian McEwan
51 Life of Pi - Yann Martel
52 Dune - Frank Herbert
53 Cold Comfort Farm - Stella Gibbons
54 Sense and Sensibility - Jane Austen
55 A Suitable Boy - Vikram Seth
56 The Shadow of the Wind - Carlos Ruiz Zafon
57 A Tale Of Two Cities - Charles Dickens
58 Brave New World - Aldous Huxley
59 The Curious Incident of the Dog in the Night-time - Mark Haddon
60 Love In The Time Of Cholera - Gabriel Garcia Marquez
61 Of Mice and Men - John Steinbeck
62 Lolita - Vladimir Nabokov
63 The Secret History - Donna Tartt
64 The Lovely Bones - Alice Sebold
65 Count of Monte Cristo - Alexandre Dumas
66 On The Road - Jack Kerouac
67 Jude the Obscure - Thomas Hardy
68 Bridget Jones’s Diary - Helen Fielding
69 Midnight’s Children - Salman Rushdie
70 Moby Dick - Herman Melville
71 Oliver Twist - Charles Dickens
72 Dracula - Bram Stoker
73 The Secret Garden - Frances Hodgson Burnett
74 Notes From A Small Island - Bill Bryson
75 Ulysses - James Joyce
76 The Inferno - Dante
77 Swallows and Amazons - Arthur Ransome
78 Germinal - Emile Zola
79 Vanity Fair - William Makepeace Thackeray
80 Possession - AS Byatt
81 A Christmas Carol - Charles Dickens
82 Cloud Atlas - David Mitchell
83 The Color Purple - Alice Walker
84 The Remains of the Day - Kazuo Ishiguro
85 Madame Bovary - Gustave Flaubert
86 A Fine Balance - Rohinton Mistry
87 Charlotte’s Web - EB White
88 The Five People You Meet In Heaven - Mitch Albom
89 Adventures of Sherlock Holmes - Sir Arthur Conan Doyle
90 The Faraway Tree Collection - Enid Blyton YES!!!!!!!
91 Heart of Darkness - Joseph Conrad
92 The Little Prince - Antoine De Saint-Exupery
93 The Wasp Factory - Iain Banks ANOTHER YES!!!!!!!!
94 Watership Down - Richard Adams
95 A Confederacy of Dunces - John Kennedy Toole
96 A Town Like Alice - Nevil Shute
97 The Three Musketeers - Alexandre Dumas
98 Hamlet - William Shakespeare
99 Charlie and the Chocolate Factory - Roald Dahl
100 Les Miserables - Victor Hugo

So that gives me a total of 19!! And 3 I've still to read. So that's 22. I object to this list as I read a lot. However the HP series is 7 books so I have read 25 of those listed, so there!!